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1. I really like monkeys. I once saw one monkey swinging in a tree and slapping another monkey in the face with his testicles. It was very funny.

2. I am scared of large expanses of water. I don’t even like being in pools by myself or too far fromother people. It’s so bad that if I am in the pool enjoying myself immensely and everyone gets out of the pool, I jump out too. Why? Because I’ve nearly drowned 3 times.

3. I am also afraid of owls. I mean, come on. They eat animals alive and spit out their skeletons. They also can twist their heads around 180 degrees. WTF?!?!

4. I am also afraid of trees. Especially at night. You never know what’s hiding in there. Like maybe an owl. Or a scary man carrying a chainsaw that chases you and your friend halfway down the street like that one Halloween. Yeah, trees are scary.

5. E.T. (the “cute” extraterrestrial who befriended Ell-i-ot) freaks me out! Seriously, what’s NOT scary about him? Let me enlighten you. He comes from another planet/galaxy/dimension and all of a sudden he’s learning our language. Not normal. His heart shines through his chest. The life of things around him (including a kid he just met) are linked to his. He can make things levitate, including bodies and bicycles. He gets very ashy (ashiness is weird) and likes to dress in women’s clothing. He hides in the closets of unsuspecting kids amidst beloved toys. He looks like a big, walking, talking turd. With blue eyes. Scary.

6. I’ve had quite a few “psychic” dreams.

7. I have also had quite a few experiences with things/creatures I don’t understand.

8. I am 25 and afraid of the dark. Seriously. I sleep with the tv on (at a minimum) and if someone turns it off I feel it and jump up to turn it back on.

I know I’m not the only one. P.S. I loved this show.

9.I have a twin brother who is 2 years younger than me. Seriously, it’s crazy how often we are on the exact same wavelength. (Get out of my head!)

Me and my brother, Aubrey

10. I love orange candy. Skittles Assorted Candy,StarBust Original 54 OZ, lollipops.

11. I also love orange soda. And grape juice.

12. I HATE CHERRIES. Cherry candy, cherry popsicles, cherry scents. Disgusting. But I like cherry pie. Weird.

No thanks

13. I also hate bananas but I love banana bread and banana pudding. The weird thing is, now that I’m pregnant, I CRAVE bananas. I still hate the texture and the taste, but I can’t get enough of them. Even weirder, I have developed allergies to formerly loved fruit like apples, pears, and mangoes. (Come on kid, stop rearranging my fruit wiring).


14. I have a split in my skull from when my nanny chased me around the house and I fell and gashed my head on the side of a table.


15. I broke my foot running from a drive-by that never happened.

16. I don’t like to curse (though they do sometimes slip out); instead I say things like: Monkey NUTS! What the fraggle rock? Awwwww….frickin monkeys! What the butterscotch (an ode to a Disney series called “The Replacements”)

17. I LOVE HARRY POTTER! Like, Really love it. I’ve been reading the series since 1999 and always go see the movies several times. How bad is my “obsession”? At one point a few years ago (before the last book was released), I was really sick and thought I was going to die (did I forget to mention that I am a hypochondriac?). My one thought was: “I hope I don’t die before Harry Potter comes out”. Lol! I can’t wait until the next movie comes out.

18. I have a very vivid imagination and very weird dreams. I can even control them. Maybe I will post a few of my musings/dreams on here every once in a while.

19. Apparently I make a lot of random faces.

20. I have nothing more to say right now. So there you have it: I am Tiffany.

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